Taking Back Ownership of Your Life Abroad
As expats, our lives can sometimes feel out of our control. Generally we rent - not own - our houses, are at the mercy of government officials for residency and visas, are more dependent on our jobs, and may not understand certain nuances of the culture in which we live.
It can almost seem like we are at the effect of the world around us, being pushed and pulled one way or another depending on what is happening outside of us.
In moments when we feel like this, it's important to take back that sense of ownership of our lives, and remember we are exactly where we want and choose to be. Here are 3 steps you can take to get back ownership of your life:
1. Reflect on your journey
It's a great practice to consider what you have done to get where you are. Make a list as you reflect on your journey. Some of mine are: accepted a job in Shanghai, met a wonderful man and got married, quit my job in education to pursue a coaching career, and moved to Thailand.
Sometimes we make the mistake of attributing decisions we made to other people - I moved for my husband's job, I am only here because I couldn't find good employment at home, if only the political situation in my home country was better I would move back home.
But the truth is that ALL of us are where we are because of choices we made. When you take ownership of all of it, you can feel powerful and strong. And doing this can empower you in making future decisions, knowing that whatever you choose will lead you down the right path.
2. Release all blame
At the same time you take back ownership of your past choices, it is strengthening to release all the blame you might be (sometimes unknowingly) carrying around. We often feel justified in blaming people or situations for how we feel, but it is never helpful because it makes us feel terrible.
I worked with a client last year who blamed her husband's job (and by extension, her husband) for her having a life she didn't want in a place she hated. Once we dove below the surface, we were able to see that the truth was she just felt like she had no control over her own life and future.
Through our work together, she realized that it was her blame, not the job or husband or city, that was causing her to feel unhappy and out of control. Working through this allowed her to release her blame, and she saw that there were endless opportunities for her to create a life she loved.
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3. Own your life
You can feel at home in and content with your life, no matter where you are. We never have control over what goes on in the world around us, but we always have control over what we think and how how we feel.
What can you believe about your life that will make you feel powerful and strong? What can you believe about it that makes you feel in control and on top of things? Come up with a list, and practice those thoughts.
If you are ready to go deeper, book a free discovery session with me! We will get clear about what you really want, pinpoint what is holding you back, and set you on the course to create your dream life abroad. Book here: https://calendly.com/jenknight/free-session ♡
Hi, I'm Jen! I am a US expat and have lived abroad for six years, first in Shanghai and now in beautiful Thailand.
I always strive to learn, grow, and be the best version of myself, and I'm so grateful I get to spend my days working with amazing expat women like you:
Women who are smart and want to reach their goals, but need help overcoming stress, overwhelm, and other obstacles so they can create their best lives abroad.